Conversation with myself

So I am reading this book "A Course in Weight Loss" by Marianne Williamson. There is an exercise in there I wanted to blog about.

Dear Unhealthy Pig,
I am sick of you. I've had it with you telling me that one bite is ok, or that a little won't hurt. Those times of making cheesy potatoes, french fries or chips seem appetizing are destroying me. Believe it or not...me is also you. Why would you want to destroy yourself? What the hell is wrong with you? You see all these people and have all these friends that are thriving eating fruit and veggies and then you see all these people and have all these friends suffering from obesity and sickness eating cooked SAD food. How many SAD eaters did you talk to in the past few weeks that were suffering from sinus infections, colds, flues, achy bodies, bowel issues, etc.? Is that what you want out of life? What is so hard about eating as many fruits and veggies as you want and thriving? Why is that an issue? Is having perfect health not what you want?
Day after day I give into you and your whining. Just shut up for once in your life and think about things. You have the knowledge of what is really good and bad for you. You know the RDA is a joke. You have read book after book and heard testimony after testimony. You saw the results of long term fruit eaters at health and fitness week. Not only were those people healthy physically, they were healthy spiritually and emotionally. That is what I want and you seem to want to sabotage it daily. I don't understand why do not want this as well? What the fuck is your problem?? I wish you were out of my life forever!

Vibrant me.

Dear Vibrant me,
I don't know why you have to be so hard on me. I am doing the best I can. I am trying to keep you safe in the only way I know how. Life is scary and I don't always know what I am doing. I want to be healthy and vibrant, but that is new territory for me. I don't understand how to be that way or how it works. I only know how to be sick. I have been sick most of my life, it is very familiar to me. How can you expect me to jump out there and start a who new life, a whole new way of being and thinking? It's not an easy thing to do and you are so pushy and mean. I need to be treated with love and understanding. I am trying the best I can. I want for us to succeed. I really do, but it's hard letting go. If I let go what will I hang on to? I might just fall and both of us will be lost forever. Who will I become? I'm scared.

Unhealthy Pig